The Backlash Of Clay Aiken

After his absolutely absurd comments on Friday regarding American Idol contestant Adam Lambert, Clay has issued a public apology. Well, sort of anyways. I mean, he did use the word "apologize" in his public statement, but I wouldn't necessarily his statement a plea for forgiveness. More than anything, he made it a shot at the bloggers of the world (like me! egads!) for getting our figurative panties in a bunch.

Since his blog is still "members only," I can't relay the entire post, but here is a link to a feed with more info. And, for those who need more snark with their news, I'll be doing something a little different today. I will relay Aiken's quotes, translate them into comprehensible sense, and then respond.

QUOTE: "I obviously meant it as a colorful statement to imply that I did not enjoy what I heard.

TRANSLATION: Now that everyone's mad at me, I suddenly realized I was only kidding.

RESPONSE: A colorful statement would be to make fun of the guy's hair or how he dresses, this seems to feel a bit below the belt. I've had some jokes made at my expense before, and consider myself a pretty good sport. But I think that despite my good sense of humor, if someone had told me that my body of work "made their ears bleed," I might be prone to taking it personally.

QUOTE: "Any performer hopes that their music will appeal to all people, but no singer realistically expects it to."

TRANSLATION: Why doesn't anyone love me?

RESPONSE: This isn't about the fanbase and what demographics fit into it. This is about you, a public figure, saying something about another public figure. Regardless of your personal tastes or preferences, you are a celebrity, and as a result have a bigger bullseye on your head. Being charitable and neutral was what you should've done. You didn't, so suck it up.

Here's where it gets fun.....

QUOTE: "My opinion is just that, only my opinion, but for as much as some of the bloggers seem to dislike me and care so little about my thoughts, they sure can waste a lot of their space on what I say,"

TRANSLATION: It makes me mad when people talk about me when I'm stupid

RESPONSE: Oh Clay, me and my blogging kin don't dislike you. I'm pretty certain that most of us aren't sitting in dark rooms rubbing our hands fiendishly and just waiting for the day you fuck up. Personally I had completely forgotten you existed. So I can safely say that we're not enacting some longstanding vendetta or anything like that.

For the most part, bloggers are the type who tend to bring up subjects that are interesting, and guess what? You're interesting right now. And you are interesting because.......and this is key now.......you did SOMETHING STUPID. Make sure you write that down next time you make a public statement. I don't really care about your talent, or what you're doing where, but when stupidity arises, I'm gonna pounce on it. I do it with a lot of you celebrity types, and to the best of my knowledge, I don't have Shia Lebeouf hunting me down (or if he is, he really sucks at it.)

After that, it's basically an apology to Lambert, who he says is the only person who deserves an apology, which I agree with. And I imagine this will be the last we hear of Aiken for a while. He'll slip into the underground, continuing to keep those 15 minutes going, and overcharging fans for the priviledge of reading his dribble. The world will continue to spin and we, the blogging masses, will find some new subject to torment for their childish ways.

I hear Nick Cannon's been kind of dumb lately.